I was walking down this alleyway at 9pm on Friday night and I saw this sparkly rock thing shining at me. So I walked up to it and I picked it up. As I was inspecting it I saw a little note attached to it. The note said “at 12am hold me in your hand and count the 10.” I took it home and at 12am I held it in my hand like the note said I counted to 10 and poof there was a puff on smoke and then I found myself in the sewer looking down with red lights in it.
Good job , I liked how you used some magical words. In this sentence “at 12am hold me in your hand and count the 10”. is it meant to say “at 12am hold me in your hand and count to 10”
I was walking down this alleyway at 9pm on Friday night and I saw this sparkly rock thing shining at me. So I walked up to it and I picked it up. As I was inspecting it I saw a little note attached to it. The note said “at 12am hold me in your hand and count to 10.” I took it home and at 12am I held it in my hand like the note said I counted to 10 and poof there was a puff of smoke and then I found myself in the sewer looking down with red lights in it.
I was staring down the tunnel with my friends behind me chanting,Go!! Go!. It felt so long. I wish I never did that bet I thought.” “ Hurry up said joe and pushed me through the opening. I was freaking out. So I ran. I ran as fast as my legs could carry me. I didn’t know what was down there. My friend voices trailed off as I went farther and further. Then silence. I slowed to a walk. I heard a splash behind me then, A clown jumped out from the blackness and snap! I looked at my hand and,there was nothing there. “Aaahhhhh!”
The dark alley.
One day everything was ending in a FLASH OF TIME.
It started off with a warning a black hole was coming everyone was going into the base ments and just waiting until it would everyone but me and just didnt believe in black hole but then I turned around and houses were getting blown away the ground was getting smashed and even the basements were getting brasher away I started to run it was started to get faster until I trip over into a really big hole I land in a dark alley then a train came and ran me over.
I trudged along the long dark tunnel aimlessly until I saw it, a light at the very end of the tunnel, with a great jolt of strength I started to run towards the light “things are finally starting to work out”, I thought to my self as I ran. BANG the sound of a shot gun rang in my ear, I felt and great pain in my chest, I was struggling to breathe, I collapsed clutching my chest breathing heavily, everything was going fuzzy my heart skipped a beat, and then……
I love the spooky element in your story, but in the last sentence ‘BANG the sound of a shot gun rang in my ear, I felt a great pain in my chest, I was struggling to breathe, I collapsed clutching my chest breathing heavily, everything was going fuzzy my heart skipped a beat, and then……’, I think you should quita few of the commas and add in full stops instead.
It is 7.00pm clock and I am still out with my friends. We have just left the shopping centre and we are trying to think of the way home, “does anyone have a way home my mum isgoing to be worried if we are not home sooon” I said. Come on let’s just start walking and see if we remember the way home. all of a sudden we are walking through a tunnel “does anyone know this tunnel” I said
“ no” said my friend Annie
“Hang on there is some light over there let’s run over to the light and see where we are” said Shay
To be continued
You need to add capital letters for the start of a sentence and full stops at the end. Also you keep saying and. When you said 7.00pm clock you should of said- it is 7:00pm. You didn’t need to say clock at the end. Just change those few things and apart from that good story.
I was walking home through a tunnel and then the ground dropped and I fell in this sewer. Everything was black and I couldn’t see anything so I put torch on my iPod and just saw concrete .Then I saw a stray cat 🐈 and started to walk of in the distance , so I followed it. We walked for about ten minutes and the lead me right infro t of my house. I walked into the house and smelted delicious spaghetti and garlic bread. I told my mum but she didn’t believe me.
OK, I admit, I took the wrong tunnel. This tunnel definitely doesn’t lead to Dustyhill. It is a dead end, and it looks creepy. There is something in the air that makes my head scream ‘get out!’ so loudly I’m surprised my eardrums aren’t damaged yet. Now, to top it all, I have just rolled my bike onto a broken beer bottle. I take a deep breath to steady my temper. Wait, there’s something here… I gasp of course. It’s the smell! And the red graffiti on the wall. Its exactly like…blood! A huge shadow falls over me. I’m trapped!
It was 10 pm 2 boys were riding their bikes down a long abandoned tunnel. This tunnel had leaks of water everywhere and the lights where terrible. The boys thought it would be fun to go down it because their friend told them something was down their something scary. They told their friend they were gonna go down but their friend thought it was a joke. If he knew he would be so scared that something would happen. They continued to walk when they heard a loud growl. They started to run. They made it about 60 feet then something big and hairy jumped down from the roof…..
Your story was a bit confusing in some places like at one point they were riding bikes then walking then running. If you made a few changes I think it would be awesome
I was walking home in the rain ☔️ and wasn’t watching where I was going. I slipped and fell down a deep dark hole. I opened my eyes to see a long rusted tunnel. I was pretty sure that it smelt like fish. Have any idea where I am? Yep I was in the sewers! I got up off the dirty floor and began walking toward the light. I heard loud groaning noises. I turned around and saw a massive shadow. I ran faster. And then suddenly the ground dropped underneath me. I awoke in a haunted house. Then I screamed at the top of my lungs “someone help me!”
It was so dark. I couldn’t see anything. I walked and walked but i still couldn’t see. As i walked more and more i walked for about 5 hours. i walked and walked and eventually i made it to a tunnel it had lights and at the end it had a bright light. I had a massive head akk i know i t dear where i was or where i had been i walked towards the light AND GUESS WHAT HAPPENED IT TURNS OUT IT WAS MY DEATH LIGHT NOT WAy out. Hhhh. then all of a sudden i sore.
I was walking down one of the many streets in the big apple(New York).
There was a strange looking man at the end of the street seeing as I am a detective I decided to follow him that’s when he came to a stop he pulled out a packed a gave it to another person a shouted STOP he ran of I chased him down the alley it was dark but I could see a light at the end but then he shot me. The bullets rickashay against the wall it hit me and I dropped to the ground
I was walking home from school and I always have to walk through this really creepy tunnel and one day there was a blue balloon in the middle of the tunnel. I turned behind me and there was a old guy looking at me and said I will get you. I ran and popped the balloon and then ran all the way home as quick as I could and told my sister and she said let’s go look for him . We left to go look for him and we didn’t have to look far for him because he followed me home and was at our and he blew the house up.
I was running down a street with no lights on a rainy night the rain was getting heavier. It was freezing I couldn’t feel my feet they were drowning in water filled shoes. Water was dripping down face it was getting hard to see. And I’d never walked home at night. And I still had to go through the creepy tunnel it was long and narrow with dim lights. I wasn’t looking forward to it and I was nearly there. I arrived at the tunnel and slowly stepped in. My steps echoed around the tunnel.
I was walking on the footpath when all of a sudden I see a maze saying please enter I decided to enter the maze and there was a clown inside just staring at me in turn around to go out and the door was locked I run down the sewer path when the clown appears right in front of me I run back the other way and there is a wall right behind me I hit the wall and fall onto my back I knew that my life was over then I woke up.
100 Word Challenge
I was walking with my dog out in the forest when I saw a tunnel that I’ve never seen before. So I decided to have a look and see if it was a short cut as I walk through the tunnel it felt like kept getting further. I was getting kinda scared so I turned around from where I entered but then the it was pitch black it’s like it got caved in or something. Then I started to get freaked out so I started to run with my dog but the tunnel kept getting further. I was stuck.
I’m with my friend on a Saturday afternoon. We’re at our local park when we see a tunnel opening.my freind and I went down the drain. When we went down the drain it was lit up by the light. We wandered down the drain when we heard screaming so we ran down to see what was there and it was a kindergarteners screaming. We looked through the drain to see the kindy kids playing. We went back through the tunnel back to the park. We went back to my place and we were shocked
Georgie was playing in the street and then he heard a voice saying.”Hi georgie, come down here we have all kinds of food and drinks and roller coasters.” “Ok” so Georgie went in and there weren’t any roller coasters or any food there was just a long hall. So georgie walked down the hall until he saw a clown standing there, and his family. He said hi but they didn’t reply. And then they vanished and a clown was there it was smiling so georgie smiled back. The End.
One day my family and I went to a haunted house on Friday 13th. When we got in the car there was a black cat and that means bad luck. Then our car turned black we got freaked out. But we thought we should get to the haunted house before dark when we got there it was just a house but it was haunted. When we went in side the haunted house lead us to a very long tunnel it was very wet and scary. So we went through it. But it was endless.
The horror sewers
I was walking down the road from school one day. Then I saw a balloon a red balloon bouncing around in the sewers entrance. Then I went to grab the balloon even though it vanished. Then I started walking through into the sewers and then the sewer door slammed shut. So I started walking further into the sewer. Then I heard a faint scream coming from the door then I heard footsteps so I started walking a little bit faster. Then it started running faster so I started to sprint and befor I could reach the end of the sewers. It struck me in the heart and it was him.
Nice story and nicely described you just missed the e on the end of before and maybe change it from I went to grab the ballon even though it vanished maybe say I went to grab the ballon just before it vanished. Very nice story though.
Can you make your story a bit more original because the whole point of 100 word challenge is to make it original and to youse your imagination. And there’s to many story’s like it already
One sunny day I was watching tv and my mum said to go get some fresh air. So I went outside and went into the woods. Because the woods are right next to my house so I walked into the woods and I saw like a hidden tunnel and I found a chest it had heaps of gold in it and treasure in it. So I ran back to my house and told my mum we became rich I could buy anything I wanted. But I really wanted a new tv and I got it.
Tomorrow is Halloween. My friends and I are all going trick or treating together.
Today I was going to the costume shop with my friends to buy a Halloween costume. I found two I like. One is a vampire and the second one is a werewolf. Two of my friends chose the vampire and the other two chose the werewolf. So it was up to me what to choose. I decided to go with the vampire.
Today is Halloween and we’ve already been to 10 houses. As I was walking I trip over a rock and fell into the sewers. It was very dark and it smelt like rotten fish.
October 16, 2017 at 8:42 am
I was walking down this alleyway at 9pm on Friday night and I saw this sparkly rock thing shining at me. So I walked up to it and I picked it up. As I was inspecting it I saw a little note attached to it. The note said “at 12am hold me in your hand and count the 10.” I took it home and at 12am I held it in my hand like the note said I counted to 10 and poof there was a puff on smoke and then I found myself in the sewer looking down with red lights in it.
October 17, 2017 at 8:01 am
Nice story it sounds good but you wright “was a puff on” instead of.
October 17, 2017 at 8:02 am
Awesome story 👍 just change the wording a bit in some spots
October 17, 2017 at 8:03 am
Good job , I liked how you used some magical words. In this sentence “at 12am hold me in your hand and count the 10”. is it meant to say “at 12am hold me in your hand and count to 10”
October 17, 2017 at 8:11 am
I was walking down this alleyway at 9pm on Friday night and I saw this sparkly rock thing shining at me. So I walked up to it and I picked it up. As I was inspecting it I saw a little note attached to it. The note said “at 12am hold me in your hand and count to 10.” I took it home and at 12am I held it in my hand like the note said I counted to 10 and poof there was a puff of smoke and then I found myself in the sewer looking down with red lights in it.
October 16, 2017 at 8:42 am
I was staring down the tunnel with my friends behind me chanting,Go!! Go!. It felt so long. I wish I never did that bet I thought.” “ Hurry up said joe and pushed me through the opening. I was freaking out. So I ran. I ran as fast as my legs could carry me. I didn’t know what was down there. My friend voices trailed off as I went farther and further. Then silence. I slowed to a walk. I heard a splash behind me then, A clown jumped out from the blackness and snap! I looked at my hand and,there was nothing there. “Aaahhhhh!”
October 17, 2017 at 8:02 am
That’s was a cool story
October 17, 2017 at 8:04 am
Great Story just add a bit more adjectives
October 17, 2017 at 8:13 am
Your use of punctuation was very good,and discribed the scene well.
October 16, 2017 at 8:43 am
The dark alley.
One day everything was ending in a FLASH OF TIME.
It started off with a warning a black hole was coming everyone was going into the base ments and just waiting until it would everyone but me and just didnt believe in black hole but then I turned around and houses were getting blown away the ground was getting smashed and even the basements were getting brasher away I started to run it was started to get faster until I trip over into a really big hole I land in a dark alley then a train came and ran me over.
October 17, 2017 at 8:02 am
It is a good story, but maybe you should put full stops and commas to more use.
October 17, 2017 at 8:07 am
Good story just change the wording I’m getting a bit lost when I read it
October 16, 2017 at 8:47 am
I trudged along the long dark tunnel aimlessly until I saw it, a light at the very end of the tunnel, with a great jolt of strength I started to run towards the light “things are finally starting to work out”, I thought to my self as I ran. BANG the sound of a shot gun rang in my ear, I felt and great pain in my chest, I was struggling to breathe, I collapsed clutching my chest breathing heavily, everything was going fuzzy my heart skipped a beat, and then……
October 17, 2017 at 8:05 am
Good story
I wonder what happened next😀
October 17, 2017 at 8:11 am
I love the spooky element in your story, but in the last sentence ‘BANG the sound of a shot gun rang in my ear, I felt a great pain in my chest, I was struggling to breathe, I collapsed clutching my chest breathing heavily, everything was going fuzzy my heart skipped a beat, and then……’, I think you should quita few of the commas and add in full stops instead.
October 16, 2017 at 8:49 am
It is 7.00pm clock and I am still out with my friends. We have just left the shopping centre and we are trying to think of the way home, “does anyone have a way home my mum isgoing to be worried if we are not home sooon” I said. Come on let’s just start walking and see if we remember the way home. all of a sudden we are walking through a tunnel “does anyone know this tunnel” I said
“ no” said my friend Annie
“Hang on there is some light over there let’s run over to the light and see where we are” said Shay
To be continued
October 17, 2017 at 8:05 am
You need to add capital letters for the start of a sentence and full stops at the end. Also you keep saying and. When you said 7.00pm clock you should of said- it is 7:00pm. You didn’t need to say clock at the end. Just change those few things and apart from that good story.
October 17, 2017 at 8:06 am
Good story but just remember capital letters at the start of every sentence.
October 17, 2017 at 8:12 am
Good story but at the beginning you say my mum isgoing instead of is going.
October 16, 2017 at 8:50 am
I was walking home through a tunnel and then the ground dropped and I fell in this sewer. Everything was black and I couldn’t see anything so I put torch on my iPod and just saw concrete .Then I saw a stray cat 🐈 and started to walk of in the distance , so I followed it. We walked for about ten minutes and the lead me right infro t of my house. I walked into the house and smelted delicious spaghetti and garlic bread. I told my mum but she didn’t believe me.
October 17, 2017 at 8:08 am
Nice story, I liked how you used all these different words
October 16, 2017 at 8:51 am
OK, I admit, I took the wrong tunnel. This tunnel definitely doesn’t lead to Dustyhill. It is a dead end, and it looks creepy. There is something in the air that makes my head scream ‘get out!’ so loudly I’m surprised my eardrums aren’t damaged yet. Now, to top it all, I have just rolled my bike onto a broken beer bottle. I take a deep breath to steady my temper. Wait, there’s something here… I gasp of course. It’s the smell! And the red graffiti on the wall. Its exactly like…blood! A huge shadow falls over me. I’m trapped!
101 words
October 16, 2017 at 8:53 am
It was 10 pm 2 boys were riding their bikes down a long abandoned tunnel. This tunnel had leaks of water everywhere and the lights where terrible. The boys thought it would be fun to go down it because their friend told them something was down their something scary. They told their friend they were gonna go down but their friend thought it was a joke. If he knew he would be so scared that something would happen. They continued to walk when they heard a loud growl. They started to run. They made it about 60 feet then something big and hairy jumped down from the roof…..
October 17, 2017 at 8:13 am
Your story was a bit confusing in some places like at one point they were riding bikes then walking then running. If you made a few changes I think it would be awesome
October 16, 2017 at 8:53 am
I was walking home in the rain ☔️ and wasn’t watching where I was going. I slipped and fell down a deep dark hole. I opened my eyes to see a long rusted tunnel. I was pretty sure that it smelt like fish. Have any idea where I am? Yep I was in the sewers! I got up off the dirty floor and began walking toward the light. I heard loud groaning noises. I turned around and saw a massive shadow. I ran faster. And then suddenly the ground dropped underneath me. I awoke in a haunted house. Then I screamed at the top of my lungs “someone help me!”
October 17, 2017 at 8:06 am
good story but you could make your sentences longer because three words isn’t really a sentence.
October 16, 2017 at 9:00 am
It was so dark. I couldn’t see anything. I walked and walked but i still couldn’t see. As i walked more and more i walked for about 5 hours. i walked and walked and eventually i made it to a tunnel it had lights and at the end it had a bright light. I had a massive head akk i know i t dear where i was or where i had been i walked towards the light AND GUESS WHAT HAPPENED IT TURNS OUT IT WAS MY DEATH LIGHT NOT WAy out. Hhhh. then all of a sudden i sore.
October 17, 2017 at 8:10 am
Amber use capital I’s and use ” “
October 16, 2017 at 9:02 am
I was walking down one of the many streets in the big apple(New York).
There was a strange looking man at the end of the street seeing as I am a detective I decided to follow him that’s when he came to a stop he pulled out a packed a gave it to another person a shouted STOP he ran of I chased him down the alley it was dark but I could see a light at the end but then he shot me. The bullets rickashay against the wall it hit me and I dropped to the ground
October 17, 2017 at 8:10 am
More full stops but good story
October 17, 2017 at 8:11 am
You should have full stops
October 16, 2017 at 9:03 am
I was walking home from school and I always have to walk through this really creepy tunnel and one day there was a blue balloon in the middle of the tunnel. I turned behind me and there was a old guy looking at me and said I will get you. I ran and popped the balloon and then ran all the way home as quick as I could and told my sister and she said let’s go look for him . We left to go look for him and we didn’t have to look far for him because he followed me home and was at our and he blew the house up.
October 17, 2017 at 8:12 am
Many you should finish you last sentence and a few more full stops.
October 16, 2017 at 9:08 am
I was running down a street with no lights on a rainy night the rain was getting heavier. It was freezing I couldn’t feel my feet they were drowning in water filled shoes. Water was dripping down face it was getting hard to see. And I’d never walked home at night. And I still had to go through the creepy tunnel it was long and narrow with dim lights. I wasn’t looking forward to it and I was nearly there. I arrived at the tunnel and slowly stepped in. My steps echoed around the tunnel.
October 16, 2017 at 9:10 am
I was walking on the footpath when all of a sudden I see a maze saying please enter I decided to enter the maze and there was a clown inside just staring at me in turn around to go out and the door was locked I run down the sewer path when the clown appears right in front of me I run back the other way and there is a wall right behind me I hit the wall and fall onto my back I knew that my life was over then I woke up.
October 16, 2017 at 9:32 am
100 Word Challenge
I was walking with my dog out in the forest when I saw a tunnel that I’ve never seen before. So I decided to have a look and see if it was a short cut as I walk through the tunnel it felt like kept getting further. I was getting kinda scared so I turned around from where I entered but then the it was pitch black it’s like it got caved in or something. Then I started to get freaked out so I started to run with my dog but the tunnel kept getting further. I was stuck.
October 16, 2017 at 9:37 am
I’m with my friend on a Saturday afternoon. We’re at our local park when we see a tunnel opening.my freind and I went down the drain. When we went down the drain it was lit up by the light. We wandered down the drain when we heard screaming so we ran down to see what was there and it was a kindergarteners screaming. We looked through the drain to see the kindy kids playing. We went back through the tunnel back to the park. We went back to my place and we were shocked
October 17, 2017 at 8:06 am
Sounds like a story a toddler would tell
October 16, 2017 at 9:40 am
Georgie was playing in the street and then he heard a voice saying.”Hi georgie, come down here we have all kinds of food and drinks and roller coasters.” “Ok” so Georgie went in and there weren’t any roller coasters or any food there was just a long hall. So georgie walked down the hall until he saw a clown standing there, and his family. He said hi but they didn’t reply. And then they vanished and a clown was there it was smiling so georgie smiled back. The End.
October 17, 2017 at 8:05 am
It went from creepy to kind
October 17, 2017 at 8:11 am
Cool story but put capital letters on the names
October 16, 2017 at 9:47 am
One day my family and I went to a haunted house on Friday 13th. When we got in the car there was a black cat and that means bad luck. Then our car turned black we got freaked out. But we thought we should get to the haunted house before dark when we got there it was just a house but it was haunted. When we went in side the haunted house lead us to a very long tunnel it was very wet and scary. So we went through it. But it was endless.
October 16, 2017 at 9:47 am
The horror sewers
I was walking down the road from school one day. Then I saw a balloon a red balloon bouncing around in the sewers entrance. Then I went to grab the balloon even though it vanished. Then I started walking through into the sewers and then the sewer door slammed shut. So I started walking further into the sewer. Then I heard a faint scream coming from the door then I heard footsteps so I started walking a little bit faster. Then it started running faster so I started to sprint and befor I could reach the end of the sewers. It struck me in the heart and it was him.
IT
October 17, 2017 at 8:13 am
Nice story and nicely described you just missed the e on the end of before and maybe change it from I went to grab the ballon even though it vanished maybe say I went to grab the ballon just before it vanished. Very nice story though.
October 17, 2017 at 8:20 am
Can you make your story a bit more original because the whole point of 100 word challenge is to make it original and to youse your imagination. And there’s to many story’s like it already
October 17, 2017 at 8:21 am
Your story is good but it’s Aalto like IT the movie
October 17, 2017 at 8:01 am
One sunny day I was watching tv and my mum said to go get some fresh air. So I went outside and went into the woods. Because the woods are right next to my house so I walked into the woods and I saw like a hidden tunnel and I found a chest it had heaps of gold in it and treasure in it. So I ran back to my house and told my mum we became rich I could buy anything I wanted. But I really wanted a new tv and I got it.
October 17, 2017 at 8:07 am
Tomorrow is Halloween. My friends and I are all going trick or treating together.
Today I was going to the costume shop with my friends to buy a Halloween costume. I found two I like. One is a vampire and the second one is a werewolf. Two of my friends chose the vampire and the other two chose the werewolf. So it was up to me what to choose. I decided to go with the vampire.
Today is Halloween and we’ve already been to 10 houses. As I was walking I trip over a rock and fell into the sewers. It was very dark and it smelt like rotten fish.
110 words
October 17, 2017 at 8:12 am
Good story, I liked how you used all these good words😀